More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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