so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
