being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize