As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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