i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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