She went from zero to smokin in five shots
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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