my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
