Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
