New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
is that a dick in a sweater?
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize