Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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