hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize