I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize