I am puke
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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