Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize
