She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize