oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
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well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
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drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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