She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Randomize
