you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
The air was thick with penises
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
i think im in europe. pls send help
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
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