garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
i think i just lost a toe
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
