I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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