Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
