Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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