I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Your tits are I can't wait for
I accidentally burped into my bong.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
