What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
