Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize
