Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
bring money and cleavage
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
