So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
