This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
