I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
