My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
porn star boner night. come get it.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
The power of my boobs compel you
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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