Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
