He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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