This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
