I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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