I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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