the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
soo... how was my night?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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