Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
