How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Randomize
