We should be called the Road Head Warriors
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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