You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Success! We fucked roommates!
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
