we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Randomize
