He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
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im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?