DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Success! We fucked roommates!
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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