We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Randomize