If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
