Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
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