i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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