Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Randomize
