We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
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