I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
