He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
